I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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