I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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