there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
