Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
