This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
