omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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