Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
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