Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
