is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
