Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
