I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
high people should be assigned attendants
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
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