I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
