I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
