oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
