so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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