He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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