Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
