Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
he was CRYING into my vagina
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
