yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
