Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
