thus making me awesome and them whores
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
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