Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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