i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
wow bdsm is so cute
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