No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
You pole danced in your parka.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize
