I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Randomize