Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I wish I only lived at night.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
