The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
