what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Randomize