my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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