Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
