i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
it was like eating out sand paper
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
