Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
