I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
