brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
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