My Higher Power is John Stamos
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
