He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
