I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
