yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
