I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
