I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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