yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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