I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
