he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I'm having to shit out rocks
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