I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
from now on my penis is your penis
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
