So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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