But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize