I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
