Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
