dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
