should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
