I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
