Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Randomize
